I’m often amazed at how the mentally challenged community weathers their greatest times of stress.  During my first few years of ministry with Special Gathering, I thought it was because they simply didn’t understand what was happening.  However, over the years, I’ve learned that our members watch the news and follow current events.  Most of them understand the world around them.

Some of them are more keenly atoned to outside events than those folks who are considered normal.  The last year of his life, Eric started carrying a calendar wherever he went.  “It’s three months and 7 days until hurricane season,” he would update me each week when I picked him up for our Saturday program. 

Before the next hurricane season, Eric died of hepatitis that resulted from a tainted blood transfusion which he had received as an infant.  He was only a kid, about 22 years old.  Born with Downs syndrome, he was a happy person who had a passion for football and swords, Superman and that last year, hurricanes.  Some of his disability lay within the autism spectrum. 

Eric became sick shortly after Hurricanes Frances and Jean roared through Indian River County, Florida.  While he was in a securely ensconced in a Federal building during the storms, he was greatly impressed by the events.  At first he seemed greatly stressed and confused by the approaching tropical storm season.  Then one Saturday, he didn’t bring his calendar.  “Where’s your calendar?” I inquired.

“I left it at home,” he assured me.  Then patting me on the shoulder as though to calm my concerns, he said,  “It’s all right though.  I’m still keeping track of the storms.” 

Slowly, he was able to completely drop his concerns.  The Bible teaches us in II Timothy that God will look after us.  Eric seemed to grow into that comforting knowledge through the next months in which we would see the end of his life.

I read recently, “Stressed is desserts spelled backwards.”  The upside down side of being under stress is something wonderful, if we allow God’s Spirit to work in our lives.  Eric learned his lesson well.

A couple of days before he died, I visited Eric in his home.  We talked about his relationship with the Lord.  Wanting to be sure that I’d touched all the bases, I pointedly asked, “Eric, have your asked Jesus to be your best friend and to take away all the bad things you’ve done?”

Eric looked at me with a disappointed and childlike quizzical expression.  “You know I have,”  he said with confidence.

“Yes.  I did know that,” I said wanting to erase the disappointment from his expression, “but I needed to be sure.” 

Wanting to change the subject, I inquired,  ”Where’s your hurricane calendar?”

“I don’t know.  I don’t need it now,”  he said honestly. 

Even at this young age, while facing death Eric had been able to turn his stress point upside down and inside out and it had become confidence in God’s grace and mercy.  That’s a great dessert for the ending of any life.

He is a handsome Jamaican whose family migrated from the Northeast to Florida when his parents retired from their work. For a couple of years, I thought Paul was non-verbal.  When I made him angry one Sunday after chapel services, I found that Paul is definitely able to speak.  In fact, even though I was shocked, his scolding, rapid-fire lecture, pleased me beyond measure.

Paul listens to music via his ear phones almost incessantly.  The vehicle carrying the tunes has progressed from a tape recorder to a CD player to an MP player.  However, the music has not changed.  He listens to opera and Christian music.

Paul is a quiet, dynamic Christian whose life is simple.  Work, home, bed.  On Sunday, the routine changes a bit.  Chapel, home, bed.  Some weeks the city bus that picks him up for chapel has been late.  On those weeks, Paul gets on his bicycle, in his best suit and tie and rides the ten miles to Special Gathering. In the Florida heat, that is no small feat.  No matter how much his parents and I have tried to discourage him from riding his bike on those mornings, he is not deterred.  He doesn’t say a word.  But we can see in his eyes that his resolve remains.  His commitment to worship remains the bedrock of his existence.

Whether at his work or at church, Paul often reaches over to touch my head.  Somehow, I knew that this was his way of blessing me.  However, years ago, I asked.  “Why do you put your hands on my head whenever you see me?’

“I’m blessing you,”  Paul said with a slight stutter.  Over the years, I periodically ask the same question.  His answer is always the same.  I’ve been deeply impressed with his lack of false humility.  He does not say, “I’m praying that God will bless you.”  He says, “I’m blessing you.”

In I Timothy 2, Paul tells Timothy, his son in the faith, “Live simply, in humble contemplation.”  While many Special Gathering members live this out in their daily lives, none are as consistent as my friend, Paul.

My life was turned upside down a few years ago when much of our house was damaged by Hurricanes Frances and Jean.  Frances started the havoc and Jean completed the task.  In the process, we realized that we needed to remake part of my office into a disability accessible bathroom to meet the increasing needs of my husband.  Most of the house rocked in upheaval during the transition.  I relived those months recently as I endured the transformation of our kitchen, family room and pantry. 

My life was no longer simple, during those weeks.  I had no water.  The most common tasks meant that I had to transport water from our back yard or the bathroom to the kitchen.  Water had to be heated, then reheated.  I couldn’t find any of the food or utensils I needed to prepare meals. 

Even my Special Gathering  endeavors were much harder.  I couldn’t locate the information I needed to update my data base.  I had no idea whether I would have internet access or not.  I seemed to spend my day uncovering and discovering where I had put valued papers, rather than actually getting tasks completed. 

I relished the times I spent with folks like Sam.  While my life was upside down, I wanted to be near someone who still had a parcel of sanity in their lives.  Sam would come to me and put his hands on my head and smile.  In many ways, God began to speak to me through this valued friend’s blessings.  “Your life will settle down.  You will be able to get through this.” 

Sam wouldn’t speak or even smile but I knew that his blessings were helping me to maneuver through the overwhelming waves of turmoil and confusion that were threatening to capsize my small, leaking vessel.  I’m grateful for Sam’s simple life of humble contemplation because during my time of stress and confusion, I could depend on his peace to help guide me to a safe harbor in spite of the complicated seas.

This is a interesting analysis on what may be the future for mentally challenged persons in the State of Florida.  This is the response from a presentation of the iBudgets, the newest innovation from APD.

Thank you for the information on iBudgets.

I find myself hear the old Kenny Rogers song; you have to know when to hold them, know when to fold them, know when to walk away, know when to run…..

iBudget – Is that not what you get when you rebase whatever Tier you got stuck in?

Correct me if I am wrong but aren’t these really the issues that we are facing?

1. Waiting list
2. Limited money (shrinking money)
3. Sustainability
4. Equity

How do you determine “Equity?”

1. Just those on the waiver?  Or for everyone?
2. Equity for those on the waiting list?  If so, what does that mean?  Do we reduce what those on the waiver now are receiving so those on the waiting list can get something?  Do we prioritize who is not the waiver based on support needs?  The new prioritizing of waiting list put (I think) mentally challenged people who parents retire and move here higher on the list than people who were born here and been on the wait list for years.  For those on the waiver it appears that the funding (Tiers) level were more favorable for those who used the system and not favorable for those family that did not try to get the system to do everything.  You can have two mentally challenged persons who are exactly the same with just one difference.  One lives in a group home and one lives with their family.  The person in the group home is in a higher Tier.  Not because their needs are greater but because their family took advantage of the system funding the group home.
3. What is fair?  Who decides?

Sustainability – What we are now doing is not sustainable.  We have to either get more money or cut services.  We get more money by either raising taxes or cutting spending somewhere else in the Sate Budget.  Does anyone think that is going to happen?  If so (back to the Kenny Rogers Song), we need to hold them.  We are living this year on stimulus money from the Feds that is not going to happen again. 

Sales taxes are down.  The State budget is shrinking.  Is a medical model sustainable?  At the second meeting of the Alternative Residential Option Work Group (which was held in Orlando) there were two things talked about that I think fit here:

1. Derrick Dufresne talked about how Group Homes were demographically unsustainable.
2. Life Share was presented as an option which was then labeled as foster care repackaged.  Before the waiver most people living in group homes were not receiving this funding we now call Res Hab.  I remember the fight about one group home in our area getting Res Hab.  The questions was asked again and again, why did only ARC group homes receive Res Hab in this county?

Limited Money – I am thinking we are at the beginning of the state saying, “we are not going to pay for that anymore.”  They have already done this with NRSS (just to name one program).  It is really what they are doing with the Tiers.  Who would have of ever thought whatever system was developed would not fund 5 days of meaningful day activity?  So if five days are not needed, why pay for five days for anyone?  Why pay for anyone to have any day program when there are people who need group homes?  What is fair (equity)?

Waiting List – For those on the waiver we do not think about this too much.  But at this time I think for every two people on the waive there is one person on the waiting list.  Those on the waiting list are more motivated because they are not receiving anything.  I hear these family saying it is not fair for those on the waiver to get everything and for us to get nothing. 

I also think there is a possibility that policy makers feel lied to.  They were told that the wavier would keep people in the community and be cheaper than putting them in institutions (ICF/MR).  With most of the people who first went on the wavier, families would have never considered putting their family member in an institutional setting. 

Policy makers were told that in the long run it would be cheaper because mentally challenged people would develop new skills, become more independent (hence cheaper) and develop community (natural) supports.  I am thinking this has not happened. 

Now the system has become unsustainable even in good financial times.  Remember when the crisis in APD budget first hit, we were not in a recession, to say nothing of the financial crisis our state and nation are in today.  I know many of my friends who are advocates feel we need to hold our ground and fight.  I think this is a fight we cannot win.

Richard Stimson

The Special Gathering

P.O. Box 685

Cocoa, Fl 32923

‘    321-632-0130

6 321-636-5821

+ rstimson@specialgatherings.com

        www.specialgatherings.com

Subject: APD – FCCF – iBudgetFlorida Power Point presentations

You all probably know about this…. I haven’t had a chance to read it yet.

Sent: Wednesday, November 04, 2009 9:49 PM
Subject: FCCF-iBudgetFlorida Power Point presentations

Hi All,

Attached please find the Power Point Presentations used to initiate the first meeting of the Stakeholders Work Group. 

Please set time aside to really go over these in detail.  Do not let the length put you off, it is good basic information we need to know.  Your understanding and input is valuable to this process and the positive outcomes that we hope to accomplish.  These PP slides introduce you to terms and language that will be important to know as this moves forward. 

Please feel free to contact Phil Pearson, Patty Houghland or myself, with questions and input.

We will have more to report at the FCCF meeting this month as well.

Hilary Brazzell, APD,  is spearheading this in depth study, and put a lot of effort into these as you will see.  She is doing an excellent job of assisting the group to understand and work to move this along to be ready for presentation to the Legislature in February.  She can be reached at hilary_brazzell@apd.state.fl.us  and really does want questions and constructive feedback from us.

I will follow up with some other readings that may assist you on iBudgets in a few days, and will also bring some additional information to the FCCF meeting as well, but thought the Power Points would be enough for right now. 

Thanks for all that you do,

Betty Kay Clements

One of my mother’s favorite verses came from Psalm 45.  Loosely transliterated the psalmist said, “I won’t fret about matters that are above my ability to understand.”   Within the mentally challenged community there are a myriad of things that we cannot understand.  The economy, electricity, thunderstorms and our monetary system are only a few. 

Often, when traveling with several of our members.  My van will make an unusual creak.  Knowing that this is a creak occasionally appears and that it has never caused me problems, I’ve learned to ignore it but not Teresa.  “What’s that?”  she will inquire.

“What’s what?” is my usual response.

“I heard something coming from your car.  What was it?”

“I don’t know.  My van sometimes makes that noise.  Ignore it.”

Within minutes, Teresa’s fretting will settle down, feeling assured because I’m unconcerned. 

I have learned that if the creaks become persistent, I must take my van to a person who can repair the problem.  But even then, I know that I’m not able to fix a carburetor that isn’t functioning correctly, so I don’t worry about the problem.  I take it to a person who knows how to diagnose and repair the problem.   

However, I’ve never learned to ignore the creak this repair bill will cause in my bank balance.  Somewhere in the back of my mind, when anything appears that will affect my bank account, I begin to fret.  Like Teresa, my first reaction is “How much will that cost?”

This summer we had to renovate our kitchen.  I’ve loved the layout and cabinets that were installed 45 years ago.  Therefore, we’ve done nothing to the kitchen, except cosmetic changes–painting and cleaning the inside of the cabinet, walls and floors.  However, the years had taken their toll and one of the cabinets literally fell apart in my hands as I opened a drawer one morning.  My husband confirmed that it was time to renovate the kitchen. 

Though about one-third less than the going rate, it cost a lot more than we anticipated.  In the middle of construction, the power lines decided to erupt into a fire-ball that sat in the wire that led into our house, one hot, humid June evening.  For four weeks, I argued and negotiated with the power company regarding needed repairs.  Power crews were at our house all hours of the day and night for two months.  Finally, the power company’s conclusion was that there was a problem in our electrical system and not their problem. 

They let me know that the expertise of our general contractor wouldn’t do.  “You must call a licensed, electrical contractor and have them access your problem,” I was told in a professional voice by the electric company’s representative.  I knew that in our geographic area this would cost a minimum of $100.  However, there seem to be nothing I could do about it.  I bit hard onto the bullet and called.  In the end, it was entirely the problem of the electrical company. 

However, before long two small motors burned out and other electrical problems appeared resulting from the electrical company’s ineptness.  The entire episode cost us over $1,000.  This wasn’t the time to whine; but bit harder on that proverbial bullet. 

Over the years, I’ve spent a great deal of time and energy concerned about things that are beyond my ability to understand.  This time, I knew I couldn’t do anything.  We were in the middle of construction.  We took money from our emergency fund and sighed deeply as I wrote the checks.

Remembering Teresa also helped.  She doesn’t understand the mechanical and electrical interworkings of my van but she has learned to trust my instincts regarding the operation of the vehicle.  She is able to rest when I assure her that the creaks and cracks aren’t an issue. 

My monetary creaks and cracks needed a steady hand from my Master and he was able to supernaturally provide.  Our banker offered us a no interest loan.  Our contractor was able to cut some corners.  The $1,000 I was sweating became a nonissue.  We cut from our plans a new appliance that we had budgeted to buy. 

A few weeks after construction was finished our son called.  “Mom,” he said, “I want to buy you and Dad a new refrigerator.  You said you didn’t need it but I want to give it to you for all the things you’ve done for my family over the years.”

A couple of days ago the new refrigerator was delivered.  It was more than I had ever planned on buying.  God had helped me to not be concerned about the things that were higher than I could understand.  And he had provided more than I could ask or think.  

I remember a country preacher once said, “There are people here tonight who would never drink alcohol or smoke a cigarette but you are killing yourselves with worry.  And you are worrying about things that you have no control over.  That is a sin.”  As Christian, we too often worry about things over which we have no control.  This is unscriptural and, yes, it could set us up for unnecessary stress that eats the life-blood from even the most godly person.

Perhaps it’s time we take a page of the book from which Teresa and the psalmist learned.  “I won’t fret about matters that are above my ability to understand.”

Debbie and Dorie were the best of friends from the day they met.  Perhaps it was because of the tension and stress of their circumstances that made each one cling to the other.  Debbie’s family was faced with the hard choice of moving their older sister from her life-long home when their mother died.  They had tried what the professionals recommended, independent living but the helps and support promised didn’t appear and she was left to fend for herself in a trailer that was familiar and homey but not suited for her needs.

Dorie is about fifteen years younger but her adopted family faced the same situation when their mother died.  Dorie was younger, sprayer but her attention deficits make it difficult for Dorie center in on anything other than the future event on which she was currently obsessing.  “I’m going on vacation in December,” Dorie would begin to tell everyone repeatedly in June.  In every lull, Dorie would repeat, “I’m going on vacation real soon.  It won’t be long now.  It’s in December.”

When Dorie wasn’t obsessing on her upcoming vacation, she would be obsessing on someone else.  “Tommy is looking at me” or “George is not sitting in his chair right.  He’s going to fall. Tell George to sit up.”

Debbie became a gentle monitor for Dorie.  “Mind your own business,” she would quietly remind her friend.  “That’s not your concern,” she would repeat often almost under her breathe.

Debbie and Dorie loved to walk, holding hands insuring that the other person didn’t fall.  Dorie would talk and Debbie would soothe.  “That’s not any of my business,” she would tell Dorie in her calm voice of reassurance. 

Everyone loves their friendship and their joy in being in each other’s presence.  But my joy comes from watching Debbie and Dorie interact.  Dorie may never learn to mind her own business but Debbie never seems to tire of reminding her that there are somethings that she should not and cannot be concerned about. 

I’ve learned several things from these two close friends.  First, not everything should be shared among friends, even best friends.  Some things need to be left unsaid.  I sometimes have to ask myself, “Is that part of your life?  Is that your business?”  If not, it is best left out of the conversation.

Second, some of us never seem to learn the damage and danger of messing in other people’s lives.  I seem to have Dorie’s problem of obsessing over the mistakes and foibles of others.  “Did you see that?  Can you imagine that he would do it THAT way?”  Of course, I’m not talking about sins but mistakes and small accidents that was better left unnoticed. 

Several weeks ago when in Disney World amusement park, I saw woman who had to be 80 years old.  She had on spiked heel sandals, that were strapped at the ankles.  She had on tight mini-shorts and a skimpy tight shirt.  Her outfit exposed too much of her extremely wrinkled skin.  Bleached blonde hair crowned her head.  Her face had gone through surgery so many times, that her visage resembled an ancient oriental baseball.  Topping the costume, she carried a purse that had rhinestones embedded on the front that shouted out the word, “SEXY.” 

I felt it was my duty to tell everyone in our party about the Halloween spectacle that I’d seen.  It was so easy to make fun, rather than mind my own business.  After the laughter had died a bit, I had a memory of Debbie poking Dorie, “Mind your own business,” she said to me. 

Paul told Timothy the same thing.  Too often,  I crowd my mind and heart with small tidbits of scorn and rejection of others and their lifestyle.  Later, I thought how much better would my life be, if I centered my thoughts on correcting my own fashion concerns and didn’t worry and even get angry about the over-sized bodies that are squeezed into T-shirts that don’t fit.  What if I didn’t worry about where my neighbor was getting the money to buy all his expensive toys on a truck driver’s salary.  What if I dropped my worries about the pastor who seems to play more golf than she spends studying her Bible? 

It may be part of Dorie’s disability to have her mind wander.  However, as difficult as it is for her, she can change.  And so can I.

I don’t like windows covered.  My husband, Frank, on the other hand likes all windows closed tightly and securely.  My compromise was to put blinds on the windows.  They can be opened widely during the day and closed tightly at night. 

A couple of months ago, I opened the blinds and my three years old niece exclaimed, “Look! The sun woke up.”  Children can turn simple things, like morning into adventures of fun.  In the same way, people with disabilities, often have the same ability.  This ability not only makes life survivable but they are irreplaceable principles for living.

Over the years, I’ve learned several life saving and irreplaceable principles.  Many of them have come from people with disabilities.  Of course, in order for them to be truthfully valuable, they must also be scriptural.  We see the chicken versus egg question coming into play.  (Remember, which comes first the chicken or the egg?)  Therefore, I’ve also found that a principle that works over a lifetime and that is valuable to living  is always scriptural. 

In the next month or so, I want to share with you some of these principles.  They are valuable, fun, and scriptural.  Many of them will be familiar to you.  They may be things that you’ve known but never quite put into thoughts.  Hope you enjoy them as I have.

This is the devotion given during our retreat on Friday evening.

The Work of Worship

II Chronicles 29:30 and 31

John 4:20-24

Central Theme:  The work of the Church is to worship God.

Introduction–Bring a watch that does not work.  Throw it away.  Bring a straw with a hole in it.  Throw it away.  I don‘t use things that don‘t work.  I am so glad that worship is such an effective tool that God has given to us, the Church.  Read  II Chronicles 29:31.

       I.     Tell the story of Hezekiah. 

              A. He became king of Judah at 25.

              B. He restored the temple and made the preachers do the things they needed to do to serve God.

              C. He told the people to clean themselves up and come to worship God.

      II.     Worshiping with other Christians is the work that we as Christians should be involved in.  And it is powerful. Worship is mentioned 102 times in the scriptures. (Read John 4:20-24). 

                A. There are several Hebrew words that are translated worship.  The most prominent is also the word for to prostrate yourself or to lie on the ground.  It is a word that is made up of two other words.  One word means to lean forward.  The other word means to kiss.    However, this isn’t the only word used for worship.

                A. Tell about Hebrew word  Avohdah.  (Ah’ vo dah)

                    1.  Hebrew Noun that has two meanings work and worship. 

                    2.  It is hard work to worship God.

                    3.  Closely related to a Hebrew verb–L’Avod–that also has two meanings: worship and work.

              B. Show my box of tools that I purchased four years ago but have not been taken out of the box.

              C  Some of us sit in a worship service but we get no benefit from it.  Worship has nothing to do with how you feel.  God is worthy of our praise and worship.  Period.

              D. You don’t sing or pray or give or listen.

              F.  We love Special Gathering and other times of worship and you would not miss one Sunday coming but you get no benefit.

     III.     As elders to people who are developmentally disabled, we model worship for our members.

              A. Almost everyone learns best when we are able to model the behaviors of others. 

              B. I learned to enter into worship from a woman who seemed to glow when she was worshipping God.  I wanted what she had so I modeled her movements. 

              C. When we worship, we are helping our members to be able to worship also.

     III.     The Benefits you can get               

              A. Singing–you get to bless God because he blesses you. 

                   1.  Singing is a joyful exercise that that Bach called “the recreation of the mind.” 

                   2.  It is practiced by every people, young and old. 

                   3.  We get to bless God in a joyful practice. 

                   4.  Everyone sings.  It may be in the car, in the shower.  But we all sing.  However, not everyone sings during worship. 

                   5.  God IS Not interested in the quality of your voice.  It is a skill.  The more you do it, the better you get.

              B. Prayer–you get to talk to God with others who are also talking to him. 

                   1.  The scriptures teach us that He answers these prayers uniquely.

                   2.  There is a powerful benefit to corporate prayer that cannot be obtained any other way.

              C. Giving–you get to put your money into the church and God multiplies it with the money of everyone else.  You cannot out give God.

              D. Listening–you can learn about Jesus and he can help you with all your needs.

                    1.  There is a unique anointing that accompanies teaching of God’s word in a corporate place.

Conclusion  Worship is vital to each of us and it is the work of the church.

Jesus deals with me as a person–not a member of a family

Matthew 9:37

Central Theme: Becoming a Christian is personal and Jesus deals with my problems as an individual.

Introduction–Everyone in a family is different. All families are incompatible. That is, all families have problems with each other.  They are not able to get along with each other. Because we are all very different.

I. Have a member Read Luke 11:39-40A.

A. Tell about Mary and Martha. 

D. Mary chose to listen to Jesus.

E. Martha chose to work for God.

F. Neither was wrong but one person made a better choice

G. Martha‘s heart was not right.

II. Jesus said that he did not get involved in family fights.

A. Because each person stands before God on his own.

1. Children are not punished for the sins of their Dad.

2. God deals with each person one-by one.

3. I learned to deal with my children one at a time when there was a fight.

A. There was always a little wrong on each side.

III. God wants to deal with you–not your neighbor or family..

A. Mary‘s heart was right that is why he commended her.

B. What if the situation had be reversed with Martha and Mary.

1. Mary would have been rebuked because God doesn’t have favorites. He deals with each person in the way they need help or correction.

C. They were a family like yours.

Conclusion–God wants your heart to be right with him, even though you live in a family or with a group of people.